Chapter 4 of the “Complicated” series on women’s fiqh, taught by Sheikh Waleed Basyouni, focuses on rulings related to social interaction. Beyond the legal rulings, this session emphasizes the essential character qualities that every Muslim woman should cultivate in her relationships with others and with Allah.
Essential Qualities of a Believing Woman
- Truthfulness (Sidq): A Muslim woman should be genuine from the inside out — not beautiful externally but empty within. True iman comes from deep conviction, not performance
- Patience (Sabr): Sabr does not simply mean waiting. It means adjusting oneself to the situation Allah has placed you in, trusting that His timeline is better than yours. Allah says: “Seek help in patience and salah”
- Respect: Sisters must respect one another’s privacy, opinions, and feelings. It is disrespectful to ask intrusive questions about pregnancy, finances, or personal matters
- Chastity and Modesty (Haya): Purity of the tongue, eyes, and body is part of having true iman. A believing woman guards herself from indecent speech and behavior
- Generosity: Being generous with money, kind words, and even a simple smile — small gestures can make a profound difference
“What Allah chooses for us is always better than what we choose for ourselves. Sabr is not just to wait — it is to adjust oneself to the situation with contentment.”
Practical Social Rulings
The session addresses common real-life scenarios Muslim women face. Regarding friendships with non-practicing people, the Sheikh advised that it is permissible as long as their behavior does not influence you toward sin. If a friend’s lifestyle begins to negatively affect your deen, it becomes necessary to distance yourself. Backbiting must be stopped immediately, and defending an absent person earns Allah’s support in your own time of need.
“If you support them behind their backs when they are being backbited, Allah will support you in your time of need. But if you do not support them, Allah will leave you in your time of need.”
Additional Rulings Addressed
- Hijab must be worn in front of male or female homosexuals
- When sleeping over at a friend’s house, proper covering should be maintained
- Using improper or suggestive nicknames for friends is discouraged, as every word spoken will be recorded and will impact us on the Day of Judgment
These social guidelines reflect Islam’s comprehensive approach to building a community rooted in honesty, mutual respect, and consciousness of Allah in every interaction.
