almost nine years ago I went outside in
the hallway in a woman past and she had
a day along I died on and and I went to
a brother and a sister I said can you
tell me if she's married and they said
no where's she from they said Yemen sin
never mind said Yemeni people don't
marry Palestinians never mind they said
no no her sister is married to him make
a story short this was on Saturday in
Washington I went back to New York on
Sunday on Monday I found their parents
house
I knocked on the door and I said does it
the wrong way
she gets
so she should you know bought some of
these traps is educating that sexual
education to the word I just want to say
one thing let the brothers and sisters
understand that very very very good and
I think this is a major problem with a
lot of us and we forget one many atelic
cut out a lot of our high school the
person that has complete reliance on
Alonso gently would be a sustainer if
you're looking for a husband if you're
looking for a wife ask allah azzawajal
first and well why he latina and I know
Allah will not let you down if your
intention is correct you're gonna get
the right wife if your intention is
correct you gotta get the right husband
I don't care how Allah Allah tell he
will manage to bring you together but
Allah Azza WA JAL will because if Allah
wants something to happen it will happen
I don't care what culture your family
from or what culture her family's from
so believe it or not in the beginning
every person comes and they said to me I
said look Allah Azza WA JAL gives you an
appointment every day and the last third
of the night frenzy in a summer dunya
Allah Azza WA JAL descends to the
heavens in Anatolia to confirm a per
minute that is relevant Allah Azza WA
Jalla fearful hell min mr. Faron Esther
fear Allah is there someone seeking
forgiveness I shall give him Hellman
time in a to wear a Wilhelm in the Hodja
is there anyone medical module comes out
in the last third of the night and ask
you that king of all kings is there
anything you want oh lewb
I be you are back what am I on Mac the
hearts of my father and your father a
bayonet asada Al Rahman
between the fingers of Allah so Jen he
will make your mother or your father
loves your future husband or loves your
future if the intention behind it is
clear because the only purpose of
marriage is for you to get your husband
husband to get you to go to Jannah and
for your wife to help you get to Jannah
so if the intention behind it is pure
Allah Azza WA JAL will make the means so
if you left up your hands when
rasulullah saaw salem said in no metal
oome that the mercy of a mother on her
child in La Mirada Redeemer metal Oh
Mira Awad idea from the arm of the
mother of our children do you think
Allah when you put your hands up and you
say along
Japanese Oh Josiah all I give me a
righteous wife you think Allah will turn
you down
of course not you think I mean will turn
you down you're asking for a righteous
husband that all you want is to turn you
to Jannah and help you to Jenna and make
you and turn your house into a beautiful
house Allah will never turn you so
that's number one and foremost answer to
all of our problems not just marriage
turn to Allah in the last third of the
night let's get up in the middle of the
night when we have the time and make dua
to Allah secondly as far as getting a
cultural differences or I am like the
chef said I had a chef that told me I
should not marry her because she's from
Yemen and sometimes my wife will like ER
Eagle marriage t-shirt killing me
Roberto de Guadalajara now like it's a
now Allah and then my mother obviously
don't like this you know my kid seen
better in the same bar ah you can have
the problem it's gonna happen every
culture Abdullah venomous it's a lie a
flaw vitamin husband mom as I said no
house should be empty of sadness you
think my houses is all filled with with
the joy or time I know it look like it
but sometimes we have problems so that
the house of Allah Salih Saleh and all
Sahaba
so with that I seal it don't think that
they'll be a perfect home you're always
going to have problems at home but ask
Allah Azza WA JAL to sustain you and
he's the best of sustainers addling
every member of the family has that
ability in that role
even without opening their mouths just
to to live the righteous life to model
it
everybody has eyes and ears they're
watching they're listening and they know
right from wrong
so I know that for a younger sibling
it's very hard to tell his or her older
siblings what to do but without saying
anything to them just by modeling it
living it you know praying in front of
them reading Quran you know having good
manners dealing with them in a very you
know respectful way it just puts them in
their tracks
and same goes with dealing with other
people you know when the sisters if it
is at school or at work they deal with
non-muslims even those who don't behave
well you find them all of a sudden
restricting their behavior because
they're now dealing with you you are in
control of the situation so I don't want
you to worry as a younger sibling that
oh if I open my mouth they're gonna you
know put me down no you don't it's not
your responsibility but to model your
Islamic behavior
absolutely we all know the story of the
scholar when a young man came over and
to try to learn something from him he on
the first day had put a mouse inside a
box and in the the box was sealed so he
had told him to deliver this mouse to
another person so on the way the
curiosity was just killing this young
man he was hearing all this he was like
what is this inside this box so he
opened it up on the way and eventually
the mouse just jumped off right so he
came back and he was like you know is
this the manna you're like I'm trust you
and I want you to take this he's like is
this that manna that you given me you
know I told you I want to become a
student you know I want to learn from
you and you give me a mouse to deliver
to someone he said if I could not trust
you when you told them to just deliver
this mask is box to this other scholar
and just keep it close they said if I
could not trust you and small things
such as a mouse how do you want me to
trust you on the Deen of Allah so each
other and secondly another teacher told
the students every one of them to take
this chicken and slaughter we're
somewhere where no one can see can you
see me yeah because he's got my voice
from Alabama so I have to
I love these voice I'm modern and yet
and they came all the way from Alabama
Eliza a gel reward him for the long
drive so one student came back and he
didn't slaughter the chicken he said why
did you not he said you told us to take
it somewhere where no one can see us and
Allah has no agenda is the old sink so I
couldn't so the the the teacher was
shocked so point be made establish a son
and tagged with a locket and Nikita
Raphael EMTALA phenolic established the
trust in our message it wallahi and in
Chicago and we did it and before another
message it we did thing called brothers
night out and I would come and I would
just go lay down I would leave the
center and I said I'll be back or wake
me up for target
and there is somewhere from 20 sometimes
280 brothers and they don't leave to go
to smoke drugs smoke cigarettes to do
anything wrong I come back or they wake
me up that message it is clean
they played their pool they've done
everything the trust was there I tell
them one word
alonzo gel I'm not here but allah
azzawajal is there and there is a demon
at it and they're writing everything
down so remember Allah is watching Allah
is writing and the book will be
presented and Omar Khayyam so you come
back and they're fully trusting given
the device but establish SN give them
the computer let him be home alone and
let them go on a trusted journey not for
the sisters out of town that's something
else but let them be trusted and buy a
life you establish and in them you're
not going to have that problem well
thank you first you know he raised the
question of the chicken or the egg but
it doesn't matter you have to always
make sure that your children are doing
what they're doing because they're doing
it for Allah subhanAllah
not for you as a parent and we see a lot
of children obeying their parents or
fearing their parents so they're praying
for that and they fast because of that
as soon as they grow up and you know
leave the home they drop all of it and
say you know I did it when I was young
and I feared you but now I don't care
and that's the risk so you have to
instill in your children that whatever
you do do it for a logic I know to Allah
to please Allah so even if you're not
there like he just said they are
watching what they're doing because they
know Allah is watching them and you
cannot you know expect the children will
really consistently go just like the
police if the police is not there people
speed people do drugs if the police is
there they behave we don't want to be
like the police we want the children to
self police themselves
it's it's a it's a it's a very big
common problem not only in I mean it's
it's in a lot of massager that is
happening from traveling from different
states it's it's all over
so two things for the for the youngsters
again I want you to understand well la
he my I'm telling you my my parents I
don't want to say they work to try not
to make sure that the marriage this
rhetoric but you know they were not very
happy in the beginning but III could see
the look in my mother's face like she's
going all the way and then you know the
way that we got there and she was very
uncomfortable and I'm sure now at home
to live Khadija and Fatima and Farah and
you know I'm far I've been a good wife
and helping me where I've got my man and
Allah by the mercy of allah azzawajal so
I'm sure her views different the point
again if Allah is Zoe Jenna first worry
about making sure that Allah and you
making a staccato and ask Allah all
along if this is good for me then oh
Allah make if this is good for me make
this marriage work
so again if Allah Azza WA JAL want for
this marriage to work and she's good for
you try to convince yourself first and
foremost have the belief that Allah
choose for you now secondly again stop
worrying about your parents first worry
about Allah and if this marriage makes
solidus Tahara if this marriage is bad
for me all law get rid of it if this
girl is going to help make it to Jannah
bring you closer and I've seen I'm
telling you brothers and sister and they
are madly in love and they are working
so hard and can you talk to my dad again
and the latest one I've talked to her
dad and I talked to the mom because she
was a
Arab and the kid was Indian and if I was
like you know I I'm not that gonna
happen and I'm so on so and he's so and
so and after I convinced the dad guess
what the marriage didn't work she just
got a divorce
sadly Sahara if allah azzawajal wants
for the marriage to work and allah
pleased with this marriage and he makes
it easy stop going against bad science
of allah is giving you signs stay away
stay away then secondly about convincing
the parents there is nothing better than
a house that is filled with Eman and
there appeared in the houses Quran and
the Sunna have teacher parents sit them
down and reason with them with Matthias
with something that is measured with ki
Tov Allah and Sunita soon the problem
our houses is not measured by Keith
Avila senator Russell anymore it's
measured with what with what just like
they told the brahim and the rest of the
privates and Mohammed Salim that we want
to deal with the religion of our fathers
and great-grandfather's we want to stuck
in their own ways if we go back to in
the house to have the Quran I was our
constitution applying everything there
that will happen and how is that gonna
happen like mamas earlier said you actin
like a role model Muslim by Fedora Allah
Azza WA JAL will bring the tranquility
in aus and you as a good Muslim in your
house Allah bring the peace in there so
three points again one please analyze
Odelle and most importantly asking Allah
Azza WA JAL salata istikhara alumina by
now Assad man our hearts is between the
fingers realized origin if Allah chooses
he will make you marry this woman no
matter how much your parents disliked
her or Alonzo it'll make you marry this
man no matter how much your parents
dislike him so if Allah willed for you
Allah will have it number two marry them
for the wrong man
Oh need to go take a break chef you're
making me nervous
married them for the right reason at the
wrong reason and that's not for the
looks don't go for the looks go for the
Deen go for the Dean also I seldom said
that uncle ma autobot woman will be
married for four and also I said himself
our ability Dean look for the one with
the religion not mean and Muslim ask her
come here sister what are you about
Quran when was the most I said unborn
tell me the names of the mothers of the
believers and the same thing as the
brother don't just ask
are you Muslim or do you just pray I
want you to ask him about his Deen you
know some of the brothers don't even
know what - mmm is how is he gonna be
your amendment how is he gonna lead you
to Jenna you really want to love forever
and for eternity you want him to take
you - Jenna I'm not just here so you
want a man that knows the Dean so number
two is you want to make sure that you
follow a solo solemn settiement are
gonna be Deena a man comes to you except
his Dean Dean I mean in Islam Mahalo or
Hanukkah Latino his religion and his
religion and his manners or manners and
religion then marry him to your
daughters so that's the second
measurement and the last and third and
most important thing is for you
conducting yourself in the right correct
manner and with that you'll be pleasing
Alonso general law will make things
easier for you
he had often mistranslated as holy war
the word jihad means to struggle Islam
does not preach violence it does not
preach vicious holy war it certainly
does not condone terror and suicide
bombing Islam preaches compassion
tolerance and justice find the truth
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